You’re at a professional development conference, and you turn to the stranger standing next to you. He also turns to face you, and in that instant your brain makes a thousand computations. Is he someone to approach or avoid? Should you flee or be friendly? Will he harm you or help you?
In about seven seconds, you’ve already decided whether or not you like this stranger. Sure, your opinion may change once you get to know him better, but that first impression always will linger.
And, by the way, while you’re consciously and unconsciously evaluating this person, he also is making the same kind of instantaneous judgments about you.
In professional interactions like these, first impressions are crucial. Once someone mentally labels you as “likeable” or “unlikeable,” everything else you do will be viewed through that filter. If someone likes you, she’ll look for the best in you. If she distrusts you, she’ll suspect devious motives in all of your subsequent actions.
While you can’t stop people from making snap decisions—the human brain is hardwired to do so as a prehistoric survival mechanism—you can understand how to make those decisions work in your favor.
First impressions are more heavily influenced by nonverbal cues than verbal ones. In fact, studies have found that nonverbal cues have more than four times the impact on the impression you make than anything you say. Luckily, the nonverbal factors that draw you to certain people are the same cues that others instinctively are looking for in you.
We all want to network and work with people who are trustworthy and energizing, who put us at ease and make us feel good about ourselves. Luckily, these are the very qualities that you can project nonverbally in those crucial initial seven seconds. Here are six powerful ways to make a positive first impression.
Adjust your attitude. People pick up your attitude instantly. Before you turn to greet a stranger, enter the team meeting, or step behind the podium to make a presentation, think about the situation and make a conscious choice about the attitude you want to embody. Attitudes that attract people include curious, friendly, happy, receptive, patient, approachable, welcoming, helpful, and curious. Attitudes that are off-putting include angry, impatient, bored, arrogant, afraid, disheartened, and suspicious.
Smile. A smile is an invitation, a sign of welcome. It says, “I’m friendly and approachable.”
Make eye contact. Looking at someone’s eyes transmits energy and indicates interest and openness. (To improve your eye contact, make a practice of noticing the eye color of everyone you meet.)
Raise your eyebrows. Open your eyes slightly more than normal to simulate the “eyebrow flash” that is the universal signal of recognition and acknowledgement.
Shake hands. This is the quickest way to establish rapport. It’s also the most effective. Research shows that it takes an average of three hours of continuous interaction to develop the same level of rapport that you can get with a single handshake.
Lean in slightly. Leaning forward shows you’re engaged and interested. But be respectful of the other person’s space. That means, in most business situations, staying about two feet away.
Once you’ve passed the “seven-second test” and are engaged in conversation with another person, you can create a lasting and positive impact by adding a single nonverbal component to a simple verbal statement. Here’s how to do it: When you meet someone, and she tells you her name, find a way to repeat that name later in the conversation. And as you do, anchor the positive emotion (which your use of her name evokes) by touching the person lightly on the forearm.
The impact of this brief touch comes from the fact that you have aroused positive feelings in an individual by remembering and using her name, and as you touch her arm, those positive emotions get linked (or anchored) to your touch. At subsequent meetings you can reactivate that initial favorable impression by once again lightly touching your acquaintance’s arm.
Every encounter, from conferences to office meetings or training sessions presents an opportunity to meet people, network, and expand your professional contacts by making a positive first impression. You’ve got just seven seconds—but if you handle it well, seven seconds are all you need!
This article originally was posted on http://www.ckg.com/. For more on body language in the workplace, check out Carol’s previous blog article in this series.
